One year ago today on December 16, 2023, I wrote this prayer in my journal. If you are in one of those seasons where your tears are the only words you can utter I hope these words give hope to your soul as you enter into His presence today.
"Father, You are the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Teach me to pray according to Your will and Your desires and Your plan and purposes. Teach me to pray. Teach me to want the things You want. Father, help me to pursue righteousness. I love You. Help me to keep Your commands. Thank You for the Holy Spirit that dwells with me and lives in me. Father, You are my peace. You are my refuge. Teach me to rest in You. I am so far from entering Your rest. I'm so far from truly understanding Your love. I'm so far from being right with You but You, oh Lord, have saved me. You have given me Jesus. You have marked me with Your blood. You have given me Your Spirit. I am nothing without You. But in You, I have all I need. You are faithful and Your mercy has washed over me. Father, teach me to delight in You. Teach me to pray. Teach me to love You the way You deserve.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender where rest is the place I operate from.
Lead me to the deep place of surrender where I love you more than any other.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender where I believe every word you have said.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender where every need I have and everything I seek after is found in You alone.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender where I trust You.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender where I fear only You.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender where You are all I want.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender that keeps me inside of your complete and perfect will.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender that makes me so dead to myself and fully alive and resurrected in You.
Father, lead me to the deep place of surrender that removes everything from my life that is not in Your perfect will.
Father, You are all and everything.
Teach me to walk hand in hand with You, at Your pace, only wanting You and nothing else. Fill me with wisdom. Speak clearly to me. Set me on fire and refine me into all You have created me to be for Your glory."
Sometimes God answers our prayers in the most unexpected and unwanted ways. What feels like loss is most often the breaking down of every false foundation and the process of restoration. Fear not, for He is with you. Your tears are holy before Him as your heart is formed into His resting place.
"And going a little farther He fell on His face and prayed, saying, "My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will." -Matthew 26:39
"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." -Psalm 147:3
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